terça-feira, 5 de abril de 2011

Jokes & Humors

Na English gentleman walked into the showroom of a Rolls Royce dealer. The salesman showed him the latest model and explained all the features the car could perform. The gentleman wrote a check of 100.000 pounds and left the check on the table. Then the gentleman saw a small hole in the engine section and asked the salesman what the hole was for. The salesman replied that this hole was where you insert that crank-shaft (manivela) in case the engine couldn’t get started. The gentleman looked at the salesman in amazement, picked up the check and walked out of the door. The salesman chased after him. When he was face to face with the gentleman, he ripped off the gentleman’s shirt, and asked: “Sir, do you know what your nipples are for?” The gentleman replied: “I don’t know. I never thought of it”. The salesman said: “Sir, God created you those nipples in case you will be pregnant with a baby.” The gentleman thought for a moment and gave the check back to the salesman.

A 15 year-old boy accompanied a 12 year-old girl to a movie, which featured Marlon Brando as a tough guy, and Marilyn Monroe a sexy woman. I one of the scenes, Marlon Brando ripped off Marilyn Monroe’s blouse, grasped her breasts and said: “I want what I want when I want them.”
After the movie, the boy walked the girl home. Suddenly the boy cornered the girl against the wall, ripped off her blouse and said: “I want what I want when I want them”. The 12 year-old girl looked at his face and said: “You have what I have when I have them”.

Many years ago, I participated in the world oil-sees Congress in Rio de Janeiro. At the Hotel Nacional, I met a handsome young American. I asked him: “Where are you from?” He replied: “Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania”. I said: “I know Pittsburgh quite well”. Then he challenged me: “Name a street!” I replied: “I don’t remember the name of the street, but there is the Schenley Park, the Duquesne University, the opera house Syria Mosque, and of course, the William Penn Hotel. He said: “My name is William Penn III, what’s your name?”
( a note: The state of Pennsylvania is named after William Penn, who, together with George Washington, Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson, fought for independence from British rule and established the United States of America).

What’s the difference between recession and depression?
Recession is when your neighbor lost his job; depression is when yourself lost your job.

Um comentário:

Etf Trader disse...

parabéns pelo seu perfil postado. sobreviver tantos anos no mercado acionário não é para qualquer um. Muitas crises, bull markets, viradas espetaculares, a queda do muro, a desvalorização do marco alemão, o crash dos anos 80, bolha da nasdaq, moratória da russia, quebra do long term capital management, subprime rapaz que viagem espetacular....
parabéns mesmo...